Do you ever feel anxious when you're scrolling?
Outfits I wore this week
Do you ever start to feel anxious when you’re scrolling? One minute you’re liking someone’s post or enjoying the content in front of you and the next you feel a wave of anxiety or shame or an icky feeling come over you.
I’m pretty sure the root cause is the age old truth that comparison is the thief of joy.
My feed is almost exclusively fashion related content. I’ve noticed this anxious feeling enters my body in two different ways.
One is when I see other small businesses killing it and I compare myself to them. I shame myself by asking why I’m not doing better, why I didn’t have that great idea, or why my business isn’t *seemingly* growing as fast.
The other, which happened to me yesterday, is when I see so much amazing style and feel like nothing I have is as cute and I “need” to buy everything I see. (Lies.) I never actually do this - I’m not an impulse shopper - but I am left feeling inadequate. Like I can’t keep up.
I see a common theme/ equation here. What I see on my scroll - what I see in my own life/business/closet = not good enough.
And that leaves me feeling like I want to disengage from social media altogether to protect myself from feeling that way.
I don’t have any great solutions here, but I decided to turn my anxiety into creativity. I read somewhere that creativity actually “cures” (not the right word, but you know what I mean) anxiety.
I put together a collage or mood board of everything that is inspiring me right now. I want to sit with it and understand why these things are grabbing my attention. I will likely appreciate most of these things for what they are, but it’s possible one or two of them might find their way into my closet eventually.
It’s really interesting seeing all of these items together what patterns emerge that I didn’t know were there. There are color themes and silhouette themes, but I can see me in all of these pieces. I love classic, authentic, chill, sensual. It turns out, I don’t need to go buy a million things, which is how I was feeling. I might add one or two pieces for summer…but I already feel better knowing I have a closet full of items that check the same box a lot of these items check. I’ll go clockwise-ish :)
I’m drawn to this sweater for the color. Blue isn’t just blue. This blue is special.
I can’t tell you how glad I am that longer shorts are in. I really like these with the embroidered detailing (I love a lot of what Cala de la Cruz is putting out right now). These are similar and are probably more practical (and they are made in a fair trade factory)…and are on sale.
I love a gold pair of hoops for the summer!
This sweater is also a really good yellow color. I like the stitching along the neckline as well. I have this yellow sweater, though not cashmere, but do I need another one? It’s the shape of this one that I love…so maybe I should consider a different color?
I’m very into the idea of poplin pants for summer. Cuffed or uncuffed with wedges or flats. I love white, but I fear they will be see through, so khaki or black could be good.
These napkins have a hold on me. I think about them way more than I care to admit. I think this color pink is just perfect. If you’re entertaining at all or just have a great outdoor dining set up, these are gorgeous.
This sort of icy blue is also really speaking to me lately. I think these shoes are really special. Btw, Freda is having their friends & family sale right now - 20% off.
Leslie Bibb wore these pants on White Lotus this season and I love this whole look. They also come in a couple other colors - the set together is stunning.
Another pair of Freda shoes. These are probably more “me” than the blue. I really like the shape of these and of course I love the raffia.
Another look from Ozma. These pants are the same style as the poplin ones above. But here I’m looking at the baby tee. I like the proportions of this outfit.
I have two gingham dresses on the board, this is the first one.
I’ll keep going clockwise with the bathing suit up next. I love Sara Cristina’s work and am really into one pieces lately. this one is really speaking to me.
Raffia Mary Janes - so cute. Enough said. This would be a great walking shoe if you’re traveling this summer.
I’ve been really into claw clips lately (I have a couple from Machete). I saw this one - that same icy blue that I’m drawn to!
This is the second gingham dress. I really like the back on this one.
And finally this pair of sunglasses. I look best in a classic chunky black frame and these caught my eye.
After doing this exercise, it might be crazy to say, but I actually feel less anxious. I feel like I understand what I’m drawn to better and why and can look at my closet with that perspective. It might be worth doing the next time you feel like you have nothing to wear or like you like everything you see on Instagram better than what’s in your closet. :)
What I wore this week
From the April Capsule…find all 30 pieces here1.
I can’t believe we’re more than halfway through April! I’m looking forward to seeing which pieces I wore the most and if there are any I don’t wear at all!
xo,
Abby
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This is a great post, Abby. I think a lot of us can relate. Especially since we are “old” enough to really remember life pre-social media, we know it wasn’t always this way and therefore maybe we are more aware of it. It’s such a catch 22. We want to have an online presence and promote ourselves/our business/make money/connect, but it’s a slippery slope to feeling, like you said, inadequate or less than. I love the idea of pivoting that into a creative moment, making our anxiousness work for us rather than against us. (Also- your brand and ethos rule and don’t let social media tell you otherwise!) x
All the yes to this! It is so easy to get swept up in the comparison game or the I need this game… I love your ideas… Jotting down why you like things or want them and also having a mood board makes so much sense and I’m definitely going to try that out! Thanks :-)